I harbour a deep disdain for breaking promises. About half a revolution ago, I pledged to pen a piece. I wish to extend my apologies to all five of you gentle readers. I seem to be suffering from a severe case of self-censorship. 

That annoying bug subdues my faculties every few months or so. Once in a while, I become obsessed with an idea until I find myself in no man’s land. There seems to be a mental realm that intersects with the spiritual and physical that, as human beings, we are just not welcome to participate in. 

I shall say no more on that matter. 

Away from the idiosyncrasies. Back to our mundane reality.

Why do doctors keep to themselves?

As many of my beloved readers have accurately surmised, my profession played an immense role in my censorship. 

Apart from having academic examinations to tackle, the mere weight of professional cynicism forced me to devolve to a point just short of regression. A doctor airing their personal opinions in the public domain is always under immense scrutiny. The profession is still somewhat archaic in this regard in most domiciles. 

Considering that I am currently in the process of permanently moving to a new territory, I found it prudent to shut my mouth and keep my ideas and opinions to myself (whether they are accurate, noble or whatever positive adjective you might come up with is irrelevant). Doctors are strictly blue-pencilled. I am no exception. 

On the teapot

Given that I have been a predominantly (unknown to most) covert fighter for my motherland’s prosperity for my entire adult life, I deserve to say a few words on the state and course of “the struggle”. 

A lot has happened. The opposition has collapsed. Did I know it would happen? Yes. What did I do about it? I gave encrypted warnings, as I’ve always done for the past seventeen years. 

I am tired. As I’ve said earlier, I spent my entire adulthood as a “covert fighter”, sounding the alarm, risking my life and limb for my motherland. It’s draining. 

Anyway, it’s not about me. It is about the flag, the people, the land and the future. 

What do I suggest we do? 

I propose a revolution (minus ballistics). The rot my home nation faces is so deep that public demonstrations, industrial action or even civil war will not cut it. We need a “mental revolution”. 

We need to change how we think. Our problem is no longer a matter of a coterie of corrupt imbeciles, but it is an evolving societal infestation of moral depravity and mental decadence. 

An apt illustration that always makes me fume is how our countryfolks define “being clever” (kungwara) and “being stupid” (kupusa). Intelligence now follows an inverse gradient to morality. In other words, those who are corrupt and criminal in their thought process and actions are “clever”, while those who abide by the rules and laws are “stupid”. 

My humble opinion is that this lack of morality and basic human decency is the fundamental enemy among my compatriots (and possibly fellow race-mates on a grand scale). I am of the view that we need to introspect and own up to our humanistic shortcomings. For how long shall we cast the blame on political parties, foreign countries, other races, demons, ancestors and whatever entity that is not ourselves?  

On that note, my faith

I remain a staunch Christian. Despite all the attacks by satan, his fellow fallen angels and the kingdom of darkness, I never lost my faith. I endured a lot at their hands, but I am grateful to Yeshua HaMashiach for continuing to save me. 

I have to confess, though. I feel somewhat let down by my fellow Christian brethren. I have this sinking feeling that they did not understand what I was trying to achieve. I received more criticism and rebuke from my Christian family than from satan’s minions (who ridiculed me to no end). 

My sincere intention was to tackle the two fundamental questions:

1. In these end times, how do you convince someone deeply deceived by satan that “all they need is science, reason and happiness” is a lie that leads to hell when they die? 
2. How do you introduce them to Jesus Christ, whose imminent return we all know is nigh?

 That is all I ever intended to solve without compromising on the sanctity of morality (not sinning) or undermining the divinity of our Lord. 

Nevertheless, I learnt a lot from my endeavours. A lot of devil worshippers (most of them prominent people in our society) openly came out to threaten, entice or mock me. I will not name even one of them. What benefit would that be? Some of them came out in solidarity with my efforts. I received a lot of tips and warnings. Thank you. I will continue to pray for their salvation. 

Next steps

I will continue writing in three spheres:

1. As a ghostwriter. So far, that is the only way I’ve made money off my writing. I have bills to pay.
2. As an academic (i.e. in journals). My days of rebellion are over (at least for now).
3. As an author. I am going to start publishing proper books, probably fiction or philosophical. I’m still working on it. 

And as for this blog, I have no idea how this will pan out. In the meantime, I bid you adieu, gentle reader. 

Stay with me.